In our media-crazy world filled with snarky humor (of which
I am sometimes a guilty participant) and relentless cynicism (also sometimes
me) it is unfortunate that when we see something in the media that is the exact
opposite it comes as a surprise. Something that is pure unadulterated innocence
and perfection that drills down to the core of humanity and the meaning of
life. This week I saw just that and I also saw the opposite.
Though I’m an engaged part of the Dad Blogger community, I
will admit that when I see a commercial, TV show or movie that portrays modern
fathers as bumbling idiots it doesn’t ruin my day. I may find it obnoxious and
think about it briefly, but my mind is constantly scattered in 300 different
directions between my kids, my job, laundry, bills, etc., so I don’t have the
bandwidth to dwell. I have pasta to boil for two hungry dudes.
12 hours later we'd become parents |
Actress Mila Kunis made a joking proclamation to all expectant fathers earlier this week on Jimmy Kimmel
Live to not say “we’re pregnant” in reference to their expectant wife/girlfriend/partner,
since men aren’t the ones physically carrying the baby. She rapid-fired several
other lame clichés influenced by her own current pregnancy, but the truth is if
a man wants to feel engaged and a part of the 40 week process which he is half responsible for creating, she
should realize that that’s actually a good thing.
There are plenty of men today who are thrilled to play an integral
role throughout both pregnancy and their children’s lives, which is a big
change from the Ward Cleaver-ish preceding generations. When Mrs. Dude was pregnant
the first time I attended every single OB/GYN visit that she did, which was
close to an hour in the car each way through LA traffic. I could have skipped
some and she wouldn’t have minded, but I wanted to be involved. I was excited
to be involved. I was determined to be involved.
The second time around I attended a few less, but that was
primarily because we had a toddler at home who needed his own time and 2 hours
in a car plus an hour in a tiny room with his mother in stirrups was not the
ideal place for it. Fatherhood is fatherhood and men should be able to say “we’re
pregnant!” if they want to. I don’t know that I personally ever used Ms. Kunis' least-favorite phrase while in that situation, but to me any man who is excited to become/be a
father should be recognized positively, for fatherhood is just about the best
gift possible.
Why we do what we do... |
Though she was funny in Forgetting
Sarah Marshall, I wouldn’t look to Mila Kunis for political, legal or
medical advice just as I wouldn’t for parenting and/or pregnancy guidance. To
me the irony of the situation is that her fiancée/baby daddy Ashton Kutcher used
to refer to his step-daughters (from ex-wife Demi Moore) as “my girls” and “my
kids” in interviews while they were together, even though he married the girls’
mother while they were teens and he wasn’t much older. Though Kutcher is most
famous for playing dumbbells in That 70s
Show and Dude, Where’s My Car?,
he’s a savvy businessman and clearly an eager and engaged father. Selling out your guy for
a cheap laugh, Mila? Dude, where’s your clue?
Coming full circle, take 60 seconds to check out the aforementioned Father’s
Day video put together by Dove Men+Care,
a brand that not only gets Dads, but encourages and supports us through thick
and thin, in real situations just like the video shows.
Disclaimer: I was not compensated for this post, but I do think it's a rad video nonetheless.
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Hey, I'm all about Instagram these days.
Come hang with me there: @DudeOfTheHouse
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