Star Wars, FOMO & Getting Ready for The Force Awakens

As my family’s Year of Star Wars Part 1 is coming to an end, when my boys become indoctrinated, initiated and almost institutionalized with Star Wars Fever, it has occurred to me that I’m suffering from a retroactive case of FOMO, or Fear of Missing Out.

FOMO is an acronym defined as ”anxiety that an exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere, often aroused by posts seen on a social media website.”

I’m generally not a jealous person and am generally happy for people who post their trips-of-a-lifetime pics on Facebook (as long as they don’t post 300), so that’s not really a point of FOMO for me. Though we all have our regrets, the one that has been on my mind lately is ironically something that I missed out on even though I was actually there.

Earlier this year at the Dad 2.0 Summit in San Francisco, one night we were bussed into the Presidio for an event at Lucasfilm. It was pretty cool walking on the hallowed grounds where so much movie magic has taken shape, yet at the same time I have to admit that I was a bit tuned out. I’d always been into Star Wars, but at the time I hadn’t seen any of the movies in quite a while and since becoming a parent my memory of the two moons of Tatooine had been replaced with a permanent memorization of Goodnight Moon. Needless to say at the time my kids’ interests were attuned elsewhere beyond a galaxy far, far away.

It’s not as though I wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings, it’s more that I just wasn’t in a Star Wars frame of mind, so it was an amazing place to be, but I was elsewhere while I was there. That being said:

I was lucky to be greeted at the event by the wisest Jedi of all:

Given directions by these two gents dressed in reverse tuxedos:

And greeted by one of the more notorious parents in film history:

Fortunately I got a warm hug from this trusty little Droid:

I was given a sneak peak that night of the hilariously clever and pithy Lego Star Wars: Droid Tales and that kickstarted some of those memories for me. I was eager to introduce that series and the larger series it inspired to my boys, and a few months later I did. Hesitantly. I wasn’t sure if (then) 5 1/2 & 2 1/2 year old boys would really understand the movies, but I can honestly say that from the first loud blast of the Star Wars theme preceding Episode IV, they were hooked. We spent the summer watching all six movies, debating their merits, highlights and lowlights and wishing we all had real lightsabers of our own.

We’ve learned a lot along the way about family, relationships and communication, because when you really look at the root of the Star Wars saga, it’s about a troubled man who sacrificed everything for the woman he loved (and lost) and again, later in life, for his son. Anakin Skywalker suffered from the ultimate case of FOMO and thankfully he was able to redeem himself as his life concluded. Though he did miss out on most of his children’s lives, at least he saw that his son became the success he never could. So his fear of missing out was extinguished as his soul was put to rest.

I’ve also erased the thoughts that I missed out on my night at Lucasfilm with the few memories of amazing things I saw there, not the least of which was this LEGO bust of George Lucas, which quasi-resembled Burt Reynolds in Boogie Nights. 

Now, I’m ready to absorb The Force Awakens with my family on the big screen, opening weekend. To paraphrase Yoda, “miss out, we will not.”

Rockin' Friday: Monkey and the Engineer

One characteristic I look for when choosing music for the Little Dude is lyrics that he can easily pick up and remember.  One recent addition to his playlist does just that, while incorporating two of his favorite things: animals and trains.

Jesse Fuller

Monkey and the Engineer was written by folk legend Jesse Fuller in the 1950s. It’s a funny song about a monkey who had been a very faithful companion to a train engineer. They’d spent so much time together, in fact, that the monkey learned how to drive the train and one day decided to take it for a spin. Or a roll. Or whatever they call driving a train. Fortunately he’d learned how to drive it from an experienced engineer and did a great job controlling locomotive #99 all the way down the track.

Though many artists have covered it, I first heard a cover of this song by the Grateful Dead who probably learned it from Jesse Fuller while he was living in the San Francisco Bay Area while they were growing up.  Though they didn’t often play it live, it was a staple of their acoustic tour in 1980. Here’s one of those performances from Radio City Music Hall:

I discovered that someone recently published a children's picture book based on this tune. I might have to check it out for my Dudes. 

What's your favorite animal-themed song?

All By Myself

I’ve learned that a lot of people don’t like doing things by themselves. They get freaked out or nervous or scared. Me?  I have a great time.  Whether it’s going to a movie or a restaurant or the mall, I really don’t mind.  I don’t want to give you the wrong impression, though. I’m not anti-social or a hermit or a leper. For the most part.

I don’t mind being alone.  I lived alone for two years in college, which was quite different from many of my friends who shared houses with 9 other Dudes.  I’m the youngest of three siblings by several years so my brother and sister were in college before I was even in high school. When I moved to California a dozen years ago I lived with my brother. Technically. Really he spent most of his time at work or his girlfriend’s house so I had the run of our 900 square foot palace including my luxurious futon and papasan.  I guess that worked out for everyone since they've been married for over a decade. Sadly the futon and I went our separate ways a few years ago.

My first home in Los Angeles: 802 West Knoll

SS and I have co-habitated for nearly 6 years.  It took a lot of getting used to for a variety of reasons but I’ll get to that in another post soon.  Over the last almost-two years however, I never knew I could enjoy living with someone as much as I do.  It’s cliché to say that since BC was born, my whole world has changed.  Not only is that very true, but so has my general outlook on life. And not just because his fingerprints are usually all over my glasses.  

Given the nature of my occupation, I’ve been fortunate to spend more time with my son than most fathers do. And it’s been great.  Even when he’s screaming like Richard Simmons at a glitter factory, I know what to do to make him laugh and suddenly everything is OK with the world again.  Sure, I could do without an extra person in my bed at around 6:30AM and the “Little Einsteins” playing in the background of my waning moments of slumber. But I wouldn’t trade it for anything.  

So in an interesting twist my wife took the Little Dude to see her sister, brother-in-law and our infant nephew in San Francisco recently.  If you know me well you know I loathe the Bay Area but will go for a few days to see family every so often.  Or if I'm promised pizza. I had a conference to attend in LA so I couldn’t go with them on this trip (DARN!) but I figured I’d be so busy that I would hardly notice they were gone.  I couldn’t have been more wrong.

Their trip was 5 days long and it felt like 50. Yes, I talked to them every day and Skyped a few times but we were on different schedules and it seemed like different planets.  I had obligations to occupy me during the days, but at night when I’m usually the Dude on Duty (and often doody, too) I was a free man.  I didn’t have to worry about slicing turkey dogs into bite size pieces or giving bubble baths or watching Elmo. Well, at least for BC, that is.

Sure, I got to watch whatever I wanted on TV and stay up as late as I desired, but there was an obvious void around the house.  I had the dog to keep me company but she’s basically an 8 pound lump.  Regardless, I figured I could work on some blog posts, catch up on some other projects,  get some sleep  and generally have a mini-staycation.

Free time never quite turns out to be as free as expected for me though. My car had issues.  I had to attend the conference.  I had to work. I intended to do a few important tasks around the house that needed to be done: cleaning, laundry, sleeping. Of course that stuff all got put off until the night before they returned. Somehow after a couple days, I thought I needed 5 or 6 more to get caught up on life. And when I went into BC’s room to straighten up, it hit me how much I really missed him.  Sure, getting drenched during his bath and having to chase him around afterward while hoping he won’t pee on the floor aren’t my primary ideas of fun. But either is chasing the lunatic dog around at all hours of the night because she guesses (wrongly) that SS is coming to rescue her from my evil grip as though I was Buffalo Bill and she was Precious. 

This trip was the longest period that I have gone without seeing BC since he was born.  When he returned he seemed like a different kid. He said new words. He ate new foods. He seemed taller. It had only been 5 days. I can't fathom what it will be like when he goes to college.

While I was glad to have a little free space for a few days and reminisce about my days of bachelorhood, I was happier to have my Little Dude back in the chateau doing the things he does best: poking me in the face while I’m sleeping, spilling Cheerios all over the floor and grabbing the dog’s tail then squealing in delight. I was very glad to have him back. Not sure if the chihuahua would agree, though.

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--JJ aka The Dude of the House