I went to a birthday party today where everyone was running around half-naked, the females greatly outnumbered the males and the birthday girl ended up in the ER after the party. Sounds like a blast, right? No, I wasn't running up and down High Street while visiting my alma mater. Rather, we took BC to the birthday party of one of his older lady friends. She is turning 3.
I had a feeling the party would be riotous when we received the invitation, but that was mainly because I knew it started at 9:00am on a Saturday. Did I mention that it was held 35 miles from where we live? Oh, I almost forgot the best part: it was a swimming party in an area where summertime temperatures regularly reach into the triple digits. I know what you’re thinking: lucky guy.
Needless to say, 9:00am was never going to happen. Even though my wife prepared everything we needed to take last night, the only way we would have been there at 9:00am was if we were kidnapped at 7:30, blindfolded and driven there in an unmarked van. Promptness is not our strong suit. There’s a pretty good chance we wouldn’t have made it to the party at 9:00am if it was held in our living room.
We left the house around 915ish, hoping to make it by 10:00 to catch the second half of the fiesta. We arrived right on (our) schedule and parked a mile away because there were apparently a half-dozen kid’s parties going on concurrently. Yahoo!
We made it inside, got into our pool gear and headed for the water. When I heard the party was being held at an aquatic center, I figured it meant there was going to be a pool where I could lay on a raft for a little while and relax while BC splashed around a kiddie pool. Boy was I wrong. This place had slides of all sizes and some aqua-jungle gym equipment in the middle of water 2-3 feet deep. I almost forgot the best part: there were these giant water cannons all over the place that sprayed water with enough pressure that they could knock the tattoos off of Lil Wayne’s neck. And those cannons could be easily manipulated by anyone around them, like the smug 8 year old who soaked me. He’ll probably think twice next time he considers doing that to an adult, as I had a few choice words for him afterward. I think this place must have been designed by either professional Martha Stewart, water safety instructors or demented sadists.
There was some mishap with the birthday girl, her foot and her father. I’m still not really sure what happened, but some woman came and told us the party was over, the girl was headed to the ER and not to let the door hit us on the way out. Good times.
On the plus side, they served some pretty good cupcakes and we got to see a few old friends we hadn’t seen in a while. BC had fun, and that’s really all that mattered. Oh, and since the party ended at 11am, we got to have lunch at a nearby Five Guys Burgers and Fries, which is easily the best “fast food” burger in Southern California. Sorry, I’m just not an In’N’Out Burger fan. Their fries are just not good.
All in all, it was a decent day. I just wish it hadn’t started so early…
Thanks for reading! Your comments are appreciated.
--JJ aka The Dude of the House
Please check out my previous blog posts: http://dudeofthehouse.blogspot.com/